Sunday, October 25, 2009

24 Week Appointment

My appointment was uneventful and disappointing at the same time. I had it on Friday and have been holding off posting until I was in a better frame of mind. You will see what I mean shortly.

I did the regular routine: Pee in a cup, weight, and talk to the nurse. She gave me the information and the lovely glucose drink for my gestational diabetes test that I need to take soon. I asked her how much weight I had gained so far. She looked at my chart and said "Oh it looks like about 16 pounds". I knew it was going to be high and I groaned. She says "Don't worry about it! You are fine!". I thought I was off the hook.

Oh no, in comes the doctor. We talk, he measures my uterus, asks if I am still nauseous and then........here comes the weight talk.

Disclaimer: If you didn't already know this, I am not a small girl. I am not huge or obese, but I am heavy. I could have stood to lose a good 15 pounds or so before becoming pregnant. I am very self-conscious about my weight and I always have been.

"Do you walk?" asks the doctor. I tell him no that I am not good at exercise. He says "Well, I would recommend that you start and maybe watch what you are eating. I don't want to see you at the end of the pregnancy having gained another 20 pounds". I told him I didn't want to gain another 20 pounds either. He says "Something has got to change. Either you modify your calories in or your calories out".

I will admit it. I knew this talk was coming at some point. As a heavier girl, I knew I should only be gaining 15-20 pounds my entire pregnancy. While I watch what I eat (very closely) during the week, on the weekends I am a little more lax.

I left his office very depressed. He basically was telling me that I was fat. I already knew this, but it stings when someone else tells you. So, I will be modifying my eating and exercise. I actually already have. I am watching my calories and tracking everything on BabyFit. I have been doing this since I got pregnant, but I am going to be more diligent about it. I am also going to walk 5 days a week for 30 minutes. I figure I can do this during my lunch hour.

Yesterday, I ate so well. I ate plenty and got in two hours worth of exercise in the form of yard work. Today, I am on track with good eating again. I am trying to make very good food choices, choosing fruits and veggies over fats. This isn't saying that I will NEVER eat dessert or fat, I will just make my portions smaller.

Do I feel better about myself? No, not really. But I am ready to prove that I can maintain a healthy weight and make my doctor proud. I do NOT want the weight talk at my next appointment.

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